How To Overcome Nervousness During Job Interview
Also, I’m going to explain to you how to handle your nerves so they’re not a problem for you anymore, how to be ready for whatever comes your way, and just how to be at peace with yourself, at home with yourself.
So stay tuned.
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The first thing I want to tell you is it’s okay to be nervous.
It’s normal. We’re all nervous. We’re all humans, right?
So telling yourself like, “I shouldn’t be nervous. I need to be more confident. I need to be this or I should be this,” that’s contributing to the fact that you’re nervous.
To meet yourself where you’re at. Just be like, “It’s okay that I’m nervous. I’m going to deal with this, and it’s okay,” and also knowing that you can still be a little nervous and you can still get the job. I’ve done it myself.
Humans are humans. We relate better to people who are human. So the fact that you’re a little nervous could actually work to your advantage.
Don’t tell yourself that you shouldn’t be nervous.
Just tell yourself, “I’m a little nervous, and that’s okay. It just means that this opportunity’s important to me. It just means I want to do my best. It just means that I’m excited about it.”
And also, the feeling of nervousness and excitement, the feeling of nervousness and exhilaration or panic or fear, all those feelings, the body doesn’t really know the difference.
You could be afraid. You can be nervous. You can be really excited. Just keep in mind that that’s okay and that there’s nothing wrong with you for being nervous.
It doesn’t mean you’re going to do any less of a good job when you get in there. It just means it’s normal, okay?
So that’s the first thing.
Two, I want you to understand that the worst thing that can happen here is you go in the interview and maybe you don’t know the answer to something.
OR you feel a little embarrassed, a little awkward, or a little inadequate, right?
So that’s basically the worst thing that can happen.
But our brain is telling us, “Oh my god. If I don’t do well on this, I’m going to die. If I don’t get this job, I’m going to die. What’s going to happen to me? What’s it going to mean if I don’t get this job? What’s it going to mean if I don’t nail this,” right?
You get to decide what it means.
The worst thing that can happen is an uncomfortable feeling, right?
So you’re not actually going to die.
Your brain thinks you are, which is why it makes you so nervous, but it’s actually going to be okay. So whatever happens, it’s going to be okay.
The third thing, I’m going to show you how to actually process a feeling so that if you do start to feel uncomfortable, embarrassed, or awkward you’re going to be okay.
Say you didn’t know the answer to the question, and say you have a bit of an awkward moment in the room, right? Say that’s the worst thing that happens.
Then you’re going to maybe feel inadequate, let’s say.
So I want you to just describe what it feels like to feel that way. So maybe after the interview, you feel like you didn’t do so well and you feel a bit disappointed.
Any other, any feeling that you might feel, name it, and then process it.
The way that you process it is you just describe it in as much detail as possible.
What does it feel like?
Where in your body do you feel it? In your stomach?
Is it in your chest, in your solar plexus?
Where do you feel the feeling?
Then, ask yourself, what color is the feeling? Is it blue? Is it gray? Is it red? Is it hot? Is it cold? Is it lukewarm? Is it spiky? Is it crackly? Is it smooth?
What does it feel like to have that feeling?
Feel it for as long as you need to feel it.
And then once you do that, it will start to fade away, right? And you’ll start to see that it’s not such a big deal.
Just a feeling, being a human. We ride these feelings like waves.
They come and go, right?
Forth, this is what’s going to make you stronger and willing to go and put yourself in situations that are uncomfortable again, which are going to move you forward in your life, and in your career, and towards what you actually want.
That’s called processing a feeling. And when we learn to do that, we can handle a lot more that comes our way.
Understanding where the nerves come from. So when you’re nervous, it’s because of the thought you’re having.
Now, it might not be fully conscious. You might not be fully conscious of the thought you’re having quite yet, but I want to bring your attention to the fact that when you’re nervous, that’s when you have those feelings of nervousness.
It’s because of a thought that you’re thinking.
So it could be something like, I failed an interview before, I didn’t know the answer before.
It could be something in your past or it could be something that you feel about yourself like I’m not good enough.
Can I really do this?
Are they going to like me?
I need to put on a performance. Anything like that would probably make you feel pretty nervous and pretty tense, right?
For example, if you were really confident, you wouldn’t be thinking thoughts like that.
You’d be thinking about like, “You know, I’m really excited to show them what it is that I can do. I’ve got some skills and some knowledge, and I’m excited to share with them what it is I’m going to be able to help them with.”
Then, notice how that feels different, right?
It feels different from I hope they like me, right?
Because now you want to show them something, and you’re excited about what you are going to bring to the table.
So very different thoughts equal very different feelings.
The fifth thing self-confident people still feel nervous, especially when it’s something they’ve never done before.
Let’s say you have never been skydiving before.
You’re going to be super nervous or you’re going to have a feeling, right?
It could be excitement, exhilaration, fear, probably fear that you’re going to die. Whatever the case is, you’re going to have a feeling because you’re a human, right?
If you’ve never done that before, you’re going to have that feeling very, very intensely to the point where you might not even want to do it.
If you have been skydiving before … And I have.
I know somebody who goes skydiving all the time, and he does it because he likes that feeling. But he doesn’t have it as intensely, and he doesn’t … He knows he’s not going to die, so he keeps going, right?
This is an extreme example.
But somebody who’s never been skydiving before, they experienced that feeling a lot more strongly than someone who has been before and they know what to expect.
It’s the same as interviewing. It’s the same with anything else.
So if you’ve done something a few times before, you kind of know a little bit more about what to expect than if you’ve never done it before.
So with interviews, it’s like everything is different every time. Some things are always going to be the same.
Like they’re probably going to say, “Tell me about yourself,” and ask you some of the same behavioral questions, right?
You’ll have a chance to share information about your skills and your abilities.
There’s a lot of things that are going to be the same, and then there are some things that are going to be a bit different.
And that’s okay.
But the more that you go, and the more that you learn, and the more that you take notes about your interview, the more confident you’re going to become, and that’s a normal part of the process.
Most of us don’t interview for a living, right? So we don’t really get super confident at interviews.
We just have times in our lives where we need to interview, and then we’re like, “Uh-oh,” and then we get super nervous because we’re not really used to it, right?
So it’s totally normal. And even really confident people still get nervous when put in situations that they’re not familiar with.
So they might handle it a lot better or they might put on a very strong confident front, but sometimes they’re still panicking inside thinking, “Uh, I don’t know what to say. I’m not sure of the answer to that,” and that’s okay.
It just means there’s more to learn here, and there’s an opportunity for you to grow.
I want you to think of it, in the context of, What I am really confident in doing?
Maybe it’s walking, right? You’re pretty confident that you can get up out of your chair and walk wherever you want to go.
OR maybe it’s driving. You’re pretty confident you can drive to the store and back, right?
You’re pretty confident that you can speak. You’re pretty confident that you can maybe hold a baby.
For me, my sister just recently had a baby, and she’s like, “You want to hold him?”
And he’s newborn, and I’m like, “Ah, I’m actually kind of nervous to hold him. I don’t really know how to hold him, how to support his head.”
I’ve not really done that a lot, so I’m nervous to do it. So after doing it a bit, I’m a lot more confident. I’m like, “Okay, yeah. Give me the baby. I got this,” right?
But the first time I did it, the first few times I did it, I was a bit nervous. It’s a human life that I was holding, and I was like, “Ah! I don’t want to mess it up.”
So, perfectly normal. It doesn’t mean anything, there’s anything wrong with me. It just means I’ve never done that or I hadn’t done it a lot or for a long time.
So with interviewing, it’s the same, right? With skydiving, it’s similar. You can take these examples of your own life.
So I want you to think of something that you’re very confident in doing and think of the first time that you did it and think of whether or not you were confident then and how you built that confidence and what you did.
And I guarantee you it involved doing it, right? so you did it first, and then you had the confidence.
And now you can say, “Okay, I’ve done it.”
The last thing I want to leave you with is the things you can do to control your nerves. A big thing is to prepare.
You want to prepare because that’s within your control. But I want you to prepare with certain thoughts in mind.
So first, I want you to ask yourself, “Why do I want that job? Why do I want to work there? What can I contribute?”
And don’t come from it from a place of I hope they like me or I want to answer all their questions correctly.
Come from it of a place of, do I like them? Do I want this?
Why do I want this?
What can I contribute?
Because this is a big part of your life, right?
Your work, you’re going to spend a lot of time there. You’re going to want to make sure you like what you’re doing.
You’re going to want to make sure you like the people that you’re interacting with every day. And if you had the opportunity to work anywhere in the world, why are you choosing them?
What is it that you’ll be contributing to?
So when you think of it like that, you can feel different feelings than I hope they like me, because those feelings will contribute to nervousness and tenseness.
If you’re thinking, “I hope they like me. I hope I say everything right. I hope that they’ll approve of what I’m saying,” that’s very different.
Then thinking, “Do I like them? Do I want this? And what is it that I’m going to be contributing that will be useful? What’s mutually beneficial for both of us? Am I going to be the right fit? Do I even want this?”
To help you with the preparation, I have a free guide available.
All you have to do is click on the image below to get it.
What you’ll get inside the guide:
Top-ten examples of stories that have proven to be impressive interview answers
The S.A.R.I. formula breakdown of how to answer these questions
The step-by-step of why it works
Fill-in-the-blank templates for each question so, you’ll be able to fill in the blanks and get going!
Now you’ll need to come up with your own stories! (You can steal the ones in the guide if they apply to you though too, I don’t mind)
If you are still getting stuck because you can’t think of your own stories…
I’ve included 25 questions that you can ask yourself to come up with your stories much quicker!
You’ll get all this in a beautifully designed workbook prepared specifically for you to prepare for your interviews.
By the end of working through this guide, you’ll be feeling confident and ready for any situational interview that comes your way!
Here is some feedback I’ve gotten from this guide, and I get new emails like this every day, and they NEVER get old!
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And remember, the current system isn’t perfect, but you can outsmart it. I’m here to prove to you that you do have what it takes.
I’ll see you next time and I can’t wait!
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