How To Get Your Dream Job (5 Pillars To Making Your Dream Job A Reality)
Hi there, in this post, I’m going to be talking about how to get your dream job, and five pillars that I’ve seen from working with all my clients, that either will prevent you or allow you to get your dream job.
Stick with it until you actually get it.
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First, I want you to understand that your dream job, or where you want to go is the map for where your journey is meant to take you in this world, in this life.
You could do anything in the world you want to do, and the reason why you’ve chosen this specific dream job is because it’s the journey that you’re meant to take, and not realizing that and not doing what it takes to get there is a waste of your brain, is a waste of who you are as a human.
There’s a reason why you want to do this, and that reason is what’s going to actually drive you through to do it.
You’re not going to need to consciously get motivated when you know what the reason is, and you’re really in touch with your reasons.
For some of my clients, some examples of some reasons are because they know that they’ve got so much to give in this area.
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For example:
One of my clients, he wanted to be a facilitator, and he wanted to teach a curriculum, he wanted to impact a lot of people with his presentation skills.
There’s a very specific reason why he wanted to do that, and he is meant to take that journey.
He’s not meant to be stuck in a cubicle doing administrative work for the rest of his life, even though that’s what he’s doing now, right?
So, he needs to realize that bigger why so that he can go and get it.
So that’s the first thing.
Your desire, the thing that you want is the roadmap for why you need to get there, and it is the journey that you’re meant to take, and not taking it is not realizing fully who you are as a human.
That’s, my friend, how important it is that if you have a dream job and you know what you want, you need to take that journey to get there, and your reason can be anything.
You don’t have to justify it to anybody. Nobody has to approve your reason.
It doesn’t have to be a big reason.
It can be simply because you don’t want to have to commute for three hours or two hours to get to work, you want more time with your family, you don’t want to be working overtime so much, you don’t want to be stressed.
Like it doesn’t have to be a big reason for self-actualization, it can be whatever reason you want, and it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad if it just means you want it because it’s going to pay you more money, or your commute’s going to be less.
It doesn’t matter, okay, and you get to pick that reason, and as long as that reason fuels you, it doesn’t matter what anybody else thinks, and nobody else even needs to know what your reason is.
The point is that it’s your reason, and it’s enough to drive you forward.
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The second pillar is belief. So belief is what is going to make or break your success.
What happens with most people is they decide they want a certain job, they decide they want to either change career, or get into this job or this role, and then they try a few times and it doesn’t work.
They go on a couple of interviews, a few interviews, and they don’t succeed, and then they let that circumstance, the fact that they didn’t succeed, they use that as evidence that they’re not going to be able to do it.
OR that it’s going to be really hard, or whatever they tell themselves, and they start to believe less and less and less that it’s possible for them, and what I need you to do is understand that when you do that, there’s no upside to doing that.
What’s the upside?
Say you go on three, four interviews, even some of my clients, when they’ve come to me, they’ve gone on like 19, 20, 30 interviews, and they haven’t succeeded.
What’s the upside in allowing yourself to believe that that means that it’s not going to work out? It just means there’s more for you to learn.
There’s more for you to understand before you can get there, but what most people do is they use it as evidence to believe that it’s not possible.
Right, and when you believe something’s not possible, then you’re never going to get yourself to take the action to make it happen.
What if I could take you to the future, if I could say come with me, I’m taking you to the future, and I’m going to show you the future of yourself.
You’re going to have the dream job that you want.
You’re going to be in a meeting, or say you’re in a boardroom, you’re presenting your ideas. You’re leading your team.
You’re solving problems at the highest level.
Say I take you there and I show you this is what it looks like, this is what your life looks like when you have it, and I tell you that is absolutely going to happen for you, but you have to go through these failed attempts to get there.
You are going to be so motivated to just keep going.
‘Cause why would you ever slow down.
If you knew for sure, and you believed so hard that it was going to happen, you would not let those little blips derail you and throw you out of the game, and let you believe it was never going to happen.
You would be like, yeah, that’s part of the process, I get it, going to keep going.
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That’s what I want you to do is picture yourself in the future, in this role that you want, doing what you want to be doing.
Feeling what it’s going to feel like to have it, and be there, and be that person.
What would you be thinking if you were that person in the morning?
So if you get up now, say you’re in a job you don’t like, or you don’t have a job, what do you think now VERSUS what you’re going to think when you get up and you have that job, instead of your dream job.
What problems are you going to be solving?
What exciting projects are you going to be working on?
Who are you going to be helping?
See, that’s what you want to get it into, the feeling of that, so you can start believing with your hear and your body, that that’s going to be where you’re going, and then you automatically start taking the action to get there.
The belief is the second pillar that you either have or you don’t have, that’s going to make or break your success, and what most people do is they let any failures.
OR any little indication along the way that they’re not going to be able to do it, they use that as evidence to say it’s probably not going to happen.
But there’s no upside in that, ’cause that means it doesn’t, right?
The alternative is to believe it’s not going to work, and then you never do any action to get there.
You don’t keep going and you don’t do the necessary action.
The biggest reason why people don’t get what they want, they want something that’s maybe challenging to get, that’s fine, doesn’t mean you can’t do it.
The biggest reason why people don’t get they want is not that they can’t do it, but it’s because they underestimate what it takes to get there, and they let things derail them, and they give up very, very easily.
Pillar number three, focusing on the past in a way that serves you versus demotivates you.
Most of the time, our brain is going to do what brains do, and it’s going to tell you, you can’t do it, it was never going to work.
Right, I told you you couldn’t do it, see?
You failed that interview, it didn’t work. That’s what your brain’s going to do on default if you allow it, but since you are a human with the prefrontal cortex, and you get to choose your thoughts, you can choose to think differently about this.
You can choose to use failure as fuel.
If, for example, say I had a client and she had failed interviews several, several times.
She’s like, “My goal was to get my dream job last year, and I didn’t do it. My goal was to get my dream job last month, and I still didn’t do it.”
She needs to be focusing on her past in a different way because, of course, that’s, maybe that’s true, it’s the circumstance, she went on 20 interviews, she didn’t get the dream job, but consciously thinking that and bringing it into her awareness like that, is not serving her, right?
It’s like if I were to do a YouTube video on talking to you about all the times I tried to get my dream job, and it didn’t work out.
OR the people that I talk to that didn’t result in any movement, like, nobody wants to hear about that because that doesn’t motivate us.
And I would never do a YouTube video on how I didn’t get, you know, how something didn’t work out for me, unless of course, I was talking about the end result, OR I did get the result because I kept in it.
We need to focus on the past in a way that serves us.
That means focusing on what did work.
What you did do, how far along you are? So she got 20 interviews, that’s huge.
So many people would love to be getting interviews and they’re not.
That means her resume’s working. That means she has it takes on paper, which is half the battle.
So now, she needs to work on the interview skills process.
But it’s a process, right?
And it doesn’t mean you can’t do it. It just means you need to hone in on the parts where you need to focus your attention.
Figure out what’s going wrong there, and come back stronger.
Focusing on your past in a way that serves you. So what have you done in the past that it’s moved you forward?
What makes you farther along? What has moved the needle?
Even the fact that you’re here means that you were seeking out help, which means that you are committed to learning and growing in order to get what you want, even if it’s hard.
That’s something that you can focus on. All the learning that you’ve done up until now.
All the skills, all the knowledge, all the experiences that you do have VERSUS well, I tried to get my dream job and I didn’t, ’cause it doesn’t matter that you did it, doesn’t have anything to do with what you can do in the future, and what you will do moving forward.
Do you see what I mean?
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Pillar four, developing the knowledge that you need to have in order to move forward in the most successful way, to come back stronger.
A client of mine is a very good student. She has her Ph.D., a very highly educated, very, very intelligent woman.
She went on an interview for data science, and she didn’t succeed in the interview.
She was asked a few specific questions that she didn’t know the answers to.
What I was telling her was, in our session was, with that information from that specific interview that she learned, that gives her data that she needs to come back stronger the next time.
Instead of using it as evidence that she can’t do it, and that’s she’s not skilled or qualified, she takes that learning and uses it very specifically to come stronger the next time.
So, she learned that she needs to learn more about a specific algorithm, why she used it, and what algorithms work best with what projects.
That’s very specific data that she never would’ve known to have gone looking for specifically in a sea of articles or books, which is what she wanted to do.
She’s like, “I need to learn all the information. I need to figure everything out before I go on another interview.”
No, you’ll never figure everything out.
Every interview, every failure, every place where you’re in a situation where you didn’t know something, you now get to know that thing, and you get to come back stronger.
You get to develop the knowledge, and the exact information that you need to move that next big step forward so that you can succeed.
And pillar five, if I could teach you anything, it would be this, we need to use failure as fuel.
We need to use a failed interview as an opportunity to come back stronger, as an opportunity to take those learnings to heart and move forward and then get your dream job.
Failures are a gift, okay. This means, every failed attempt has a lesson to learn, and it is a gift that you could never get by studying, practicing over, and over, and over.
You could go on 70 more interviews, and if you don’t take those gifts of learning and knowledge that you got from all your failures, you would still be doing the same thing over and over again.
We need to understand that failure’s not a bad thing. Okay, failure just means we have another lesson to learn, okay, and if we can’t identify that lesson, we’ll just be doing the same thing over and over again, and we’ll be like, why isn’t it working?
And it’s because we haven’t taken the proper lesson to heart yet. And there will be a lot of lessons to learn along the way, but that’s okay.
It’s hard, that’s why most people, are either settled in a job where they’re comfortable, and they make the decision to stay out of fear, or maybe they tried a few times and they failed, and then they decided that that meant they couldn’t move forward, but failure is fuel, my friend.
Failure is a gift.
The fact that you put yourself in a position to fail in the first place, means you have courage.
And we need the courage to get to what we want.
You have the courage to fail once, twice, 20 times, that’s what’s going to make you stronger, and this is also going to give you the meta-skill of being able to achieve the results you want, in anything you want in your life.
If you have the skill of understanding that failure isn’t bad, it doesn’t mean stop, so when you fail at something, it doesn’t mean stop and go back, it means give me what I need to know from this failure, and let’s come back stronger, let’s be fueled by it, let’s be curious about it.
Let’s do this right, it doesn’t mean stop. It just means evaluate, and let’s keep going.
In conclusion
There you have it, my friends.
The five pillars you need to get your dream job, and why most people don’t do it, because, let’s face it, it’s not easy or everyone would have it, right?
That’s okay, you just need to be willing to show up for the hard things, and that’s what I’m here to do, is help you with that.
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Also, If you need some help with your belief, with your self-compassion, with your ability to fail, with your ability to use your failure as fuel, with your evaluating of your results, I can help you with that too.
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And remember, the current system isn’t perfect, but you can outsmart it. I’m here to prove to you that you do have what it takes.
I’ll see you next time and I can’t wait!
In Work & Life
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– XO Natalie
