Getting Interviews But No Job Offers (Why Employers Reject You)
Are you getting interviews, but no job offers? If that’s the case, this post is for you. I’m going to explain to you the two reasons why this could be, and what you can do about it.
So stay tuned.
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If you are one of the people, who keep getting interviews, first of all, a good job, because not everybody gets interviews.
That means that your resume’s working. People want to talk to you.
So first of all, acknowledge that that’s a win.
Secondly, if you’re not moving past to the job offer stage, there are two reasons why.
The first reason is, it really had nothing to do with you.
This is not something that you could’ve controlled.
And this happens all the time. Being on the other side of it, I can tell you, that this happens all the time.
There could be any number of reasons that there was nothing you coulda done about it, you might’ve been the most amazing, most wonderful person in the entire world, and you might still never have gotten the job.
Some examples of those reasons might be:
- They were restructuring internally;
- They canceled the position, but they didn’t tell you;
- The hiring manager got sick, and he wasn’t able to interview, so they put somebody internally, into that position;
- They had already pre-decided, but for some reason, company policy said they had to post it. You were interviewed later, and they kind of already decided on somebody;
- They ran outta budget;
- Something changed internally;
- They had a major incident, something that they had to move their focus from hiring to this major incident that required their attention. It could be something like a lawsuit, the company could be going through some sort of a lawsuit;
- OR, they could hire somebody who is a family member or a friend that you didn’t know, you were not aware of this.
Any number of things coulda happened, that had nothing to do with you, and I want you to first recognize that that could be a possibility.
And so if you are beating yourself up, and telling yourself that you coulda done better or you coulda been better, or you could’ve answered better. Maybe that’s redundant.
Because maybe that’s not even true. So, a lot of the times, that happens.
Secondly, there might be something that you can learn here. There might be something very clear that you could’ve done differently.
What if there was really something that you could specifically do?
How can you know what it was, and how can you do better next time?
First of all, don’t beat yourself up. Because that doesn’t serve any purpose.
A lot of people do this and then they’ll come to me, we’re on a coaching call, they’ll be like “Oh, I didn’t get it, I feel disappointed, I feel rejected, I didn’t do a very good job of answering their questions, I should have known this. I knew the answer but I didn’t say it.”
OR maybe there was a test involved, and you’re like “I knew how to do it, but I wasn’t able to perform, or I wasn’t able to do it in front of them.”
So, maybe you know, exactly what the problem was, first of all, that’s great, you know.
Right, so now you have that self-awareness, great self-awareness, and now we can deal with it. Secondly, don’t beat yourself up.
Think of this: When you tell yourself things like, “I should have known better, I should know this. How could I have been so,” insert choice word: Stupid, ignorant, whatever. How could I have been, and not done it?”
That makes you feel, like crap, right?
I would imagine, it would make me feel like crap. So, there’s no upside in telling yourself that. And what it is, is it’s just punching yourself in the face.
Right, you’re just like, “I’m just punching yourself in the face.”
And maybe you’re really good at punching yourself in the face, right? “I should have known this, I should have done better, I should have been better. I knew the answer, but I couldn’t say it.”
OR “Damn it, I knew that I should have thought of that.” No upside. Because, when you feel bad, you’re not motivated, to go back out there.
And actually getting what you want. You’re motivated, to sit in, and be like, “Oh, I feel sorry for myself, I suck, I should have known better, how could I have been so stupid.” Right?
You know where that pattern leads you. And it doesn’t lead you anywhere good. So I’m suggesting we’re going to shift that into an evaluation mode, which is going to make you feel a lot better.
First of all, we’re going to look at what you did, without any judgment.
So you’re not going to judge yourself, you’re not going to punch yourself in the face about it, you’re just going to look at it very objectively, and be like, asking these three questions, okay?
First question: What went well?
So, there’s obviously things that went well. Right? You showed up, first of all, you got the interview in the first place.
Was it an interview for a good position? Was it a good opportunity that you got? You showed up on time, you found the place, you were well-presented.
That could be the second thing that went well, right, so you just want to grab all the things that you remember that went well.
It’s very important that you do this first because your brain is immediately going to want to go to all the things that didn’t go well. But we will get to that.
Secondly, what didn’t go well?
So were there a few specific questions that you didn’t know the answers to?
Okay, great, write them down. How are you going to really dig in, study those, and be ready for next time?
Right, so that’s valuable data, valuable information. Nothing you need to beat yourself up over. Not a big deal.
And then, what are you going to do differently next time? Okay?
Because, it’s one thing, failing an interview, not getting the job, because of something that you did. And then it’s another thing, wasting that learning opportunity.
A lot of people will just keep going, and feel depressed and feel nervous and feel anxious and just feel bad throughout the entire process, and just keep going and going through the motions of doing it, but feeling bad the whole time.
And that’s the whole reason, why they’re not succeeding. ‘Cause you need to be able to feel good about yourself.
You need to be able to feel good about the fact that you keep showing up, even if you’re not getting the results yet. Because your tolerance to failure is what’s going to get you the result.
We have two options, right? The option of, feeling sorry for ourselves, for failing.
So that’s thoughts in your head like, “Oh I should have known better, I can’t believe I did that, it didn’t work out. Nobody’s going to want me, I’m never going to get it, this is never going to work.”
Right, that’s one option. And that leads you down a path, which maybe you’ve been down, I know I have. And you don’t like it, it’s not fun.
And then there’s the other option. And it’s a choice, very optional choice, to be like “Okay. That one didn’t work out. What’s next? What went well, what didn’t go well? What am I going to do differently next time? Where are my next opportunities going to be?”
And when you’re focused in that direction, there is an upside to that. First of all, it’s a very clear upside, because you’re focused on where you want to go. And what you focus on, you get more of.
Secondly, you’re not quitting. You’re not letting yourself get thrown outta the game, by one thing that didn’t work out.
You have the option to say “Okay, no big deal. I failed at that, what’s next?” Yeah, it was a failure, that didn’t work, right?
Failure’s actually not a bad thing, it’s good. We want to be failing, right, because failure leads us to success. Every great success was built on a pile of failures.
So that’s we want you to focus on, okay, so you’re like “Okay. I got another failure under my belt, what did I learn from that? What is next?”
Those are the two paths you can choose to take.
You can choose to feel sorry for yourself.
And that leads to you feeling ashamed and feeling bad. And from that place, you’re never going to want to get up and go back out. Nobody would.
OR, you can just be like “Okay. That didn’t work out, what’s next? Why didn’t it work out, is there anything I could do differently? What’s next?”
And if you really think that you showed up amazingly well. You did your best. You gave them your all.
You showed them how you could serve. And they didn’t want you, that’s okay. Someone else is.
The third thing that I wanted to tell you was that a lot of people will use that failure.
And make it mean something about their own inherent value.
And that will definitely keep them from succeeding.
It’s another choice, you can make it mean that you suck, there’s something wrong with you.
OR you can just be like, “Okay, well they didn’t understand what I was offering. They didn’t see the value, maybe I didn’t explain it properly. Maybe I can explain it a bit better next time. Next time I’m going to tell them in a different way what it is I’m going to offer. But, it doesn’t mean that I’m any less valuable.”
So it’s like if you went around, giving out $100 bills to people.
And, say you go up in the street and you offer somebody a $100 bill.
And they say “No, I don’t want that.”
Are you going to think, “Oh there’s something wrong with the $100 bill, why don’t they want it?”
No, you’re going to be like, “What? Are they nuts, did they not understand I’m offering them $100 here? Alright, well who else wants it?”
I want you to look at that, and be like, are you making it mean something about your own value? That you’re not getting the job, or that you’re not getting past the first round or the second round?
Are you making that mean something about you, because if you are, then you’re probably feeling bad?
And that’s probably affecting you getting back out there and going and doing it again.
It’s called your failure tolerance. How high is your failure tolerance?
So the most successful people have the highest failure tolerance. And that means, that they’re willing to get rejected, they’re willing to fail until they getting the result they want.
And that builds a stronger muscle, it makes you stronger, and it makes you able to achieve what you want to achieve.
The people who are not successful. People who give up, and stay in a mediocre position, or don’t move forward, are the people who fail once or twice, or three times, or however many times they fail.
And decide that it’s not for them, they can’t do it, it’s never going to work. So the only reason somebody actually wouldn’t be able to achieve what they want is if they decide to give up.
And that is completely a choice. Keep that in mind. So if you are getting rejected, for jobs that you really want. It could be because it had nothing to do with you. It could be because you have more to learn.
Either way, you’re winning or learning. And as long as you look at it that way, and you keep going, you will succeed.
Take it from me, I’ve talked to hundreds of people, I’ve been on dozens of interviews, not all of them go really well.
Some of them do, some of them don’t, but there’s always something to learn.
And if I decided that I was going to wallow in self-pity and tell myself I sucked and I couldn’t do it.
Then that would be true. And I wouldn’t be doing anything.
It’s okay to fail. It’s okay getting rejected. Just learn from it, don’t waste it, okay? So what went well, what didn’t go well, and what can you do differently next time? Then, you say “Next.”
If you want some more help from me, I want to invite you to a free workshop, it’s called Four Days To A Six-figure Job You Love.
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And remember, the current system isn’t perfect, but you can outsmart it. I’m here to prove to you that you do have what it takes.
I’ll see you next time and I can’t wait!
In Work & Life
I’ve got your back
– XO Natalie